MELISSA D’ATRE

Q. If you could have one gigantic billboard with anything on it, what would it say and why?

It would be E. E. Cummings’ quote, “It takes courage to grow up and become who you really are.” And it would have a picture of a baby sea turtle crawling out to sea. I think all of us struggle on some level with performance, people-pleasing, co-dependency, and so on. We’re constantly looking to others to learn where we belong, if we belong, what we should or shouldn’t do, how we should look, what it takes to feel loved, have our needs met, and meet the needs of others. With so many outside influences contributing to who we think we are, it’s easy to become untethered and unauthentic. I’m inspired by the sea turtle’s journey, dauntless perseverance, and gracefulness, and how they never seem to forget where they belong.

Q. What advice would you give a smart, driven college student about to enter the “real world”? What advice should they ignore?

To those smart, driven students about to enter the “real world,” including my own teens, I say, above all else, “be kind.” Be kind to yourself and be kind to others; take the time to listen well, both to others and to your own heart, and learn the art of self-compassion and of self-integration, choosing to be your truest self and giving others permission to do the same.

Q. In the last five years, what new belief, behavior, or habit has most improved your life?

Studying the Enneagram has changed the way I see myself and others. It’s helped me to become more curious, more forgiving, less self-limiting, less judgmental, and so much more.

Q. In a different world, let’s say in a parallel universe, what would your alternative career be?

In a parallel universe, I suspect I would still choose teaching, however, maybe I would stick with art or psychology. I think teaching is just an inherent part of who I am, regardless of the subject matter or students.